As I was sitting at work yesterday morning looking at my calendar I had the bright idea of counting the days I had left until I marry Josh. BAD IDEA! As I made my way closer to the day I realized the days were getting smaller and smaller. When I first began this blog I had about 100 days left and now I have about 22 days left until my wedding day. Sadly enough I started to almost hyperventilate! There wasn't enough oxygen in the room and I started to get a little dizzy. I thought Wow so this is what this is like, never having experienced it before it was quite a disgusting feeling to say the least. And before I could have a complete meltdown in front of everyone at the office I took a few deep breaths to calm myself and I tried to think of the reasons why I couldn't breathe.
1. I'm getting married in 22 days!
2. I am going to be a wife
3. I have to cook and clean for this man (I avoid the kitchen like the plague)
4. We are going to be a family
5. We are going to have a lot of bills
As the thoughts entered my mind, I figured well at least my list didn't consist of regrets, missing out on life, or being chained to one man forever. I'm not scared of living the rest of my life wih Josh. I love him more and more everyday. He is the perfect man for me. And I am the best version of me when I am with him. My small panic attack was due to the huge journey I am about to embark, with no map or guidebook we will begin our family and learn by trial and error. It is a big step in my life, but knowing Josh is at my side comforts me and the vision I have for our future together. They always say if you want to make God laugh tell him your plans. Well God has a sense of humor so I have accepted that my life will be full of joy, tears, achievements, sorrows, success, pains, and much more but I have Josh to help me through and with our faith in God we can make it through anything.
I am so thankful I have such a great family and am about to join another great family who loves us and supports us and SHOCKER we all get along! (I hope it continues that way...I guess everyone's on their best behavior at first but for first impressions it was a success).
Life is all about choices, we choose to love or hate; we choose to speak or listen; and we choose to live or die. I have decided to get married and I have chosen to enjoy it with all it's marvels and downfalls.
So in the lovely words of Frobert Frost I hope I too can take the road less traveled in life so that one day I may look back and think "And that has made all the difference".